So, the new kid arrived. Unlike all the other new things that come to the house, the man in the brown uniform didn’t ring the bell and leave it at the doorstep for me to bark at incessantly. It just kind of appeared and without any warning. Unless all those months of “Ohhh you don’t know what you’re in for!” followed by a pat on the head was considered my warning. But, warning or not, it’s here.

The new kid sleeps a lot. There’s a lot of chatter about not waking a sleeping baby. They also say similar dumb phrases in regards to me when I’m snoozing. Something about letting sleeping dogs lie? But anyway, it’s kind of boring and stays pretty quiet usually.

But then there are the times when it screams louder than I do when my tail gets stepped on. Oh my Dog, it screams so loud! Usually, it screams after it’s been sleeping for a long time and it won’t stop until they shove food in its mouth. Funny, because the food is not in a bowl that it sticks its head into like I have to do. Methinks there is some favoritism.

It also screams when it’s up on the table with its legs apart. I can smell something delicious whenever that happens, but I wonder if something’s wrong with my nose because they’re always saying how gross it smells. I hope I’m not mistaken and my terrier nose is not failing me at such a young age because it really does smell as lovely as the fire hydrants, the grass on my walk, and the trash I sometimes get into when they’re not looking (suckers).

Oh, and speaking of walk, it looks as though we have company. Finally, she’s walking again after having a gigantic stomach for the past 40 or so weeks. It’s about time. Someone must have told her she was looking quite round and now she’s walking and bringing her with me again, which on one hand is glorious, but on the other hand, I have to share a sidewalk with the new kid which is in a mini car I constantly have to dodge. The first few times she brought me and the kid out on a walk with her, I got tangled up in the wheels and shrieked and then got yelled at for “not being careful.” Well excuse me! I am in a hurry. I must get to the tree and make sure everyone knows it’s mine before the new kid gets to it. I’m learning, though, that the new kid is not interested in claiming the trees, so I’m a little more relaxed on the walks now. Oh, and her stomach went back to normal after the kid got here, so obviously the walks are working.

The new kid now sleeps in its own room and the best part is that when I want a place to hide and have some “me” time, I go under its cage and lay there watching their feet walk around. A long time ago, before I got here, I used to be in a cage and it was really dark and quite uncomfortable. The new kid’s cage is really nice. It’s white and has colorful (so I’m told. I’m colorblind) patterns draping from it. And best of all, it’s open on top. Lucky! My cage never had an open top.

Once in a while, they take the kid and lay it on its stomach on a soft blanket and I like to lay down next to it and get my fair share of the cushiony comfort. They always try to take my picture when I do this and squeal things like, “Look how cute!” and “Ohhh he loves her!” I don’t know what any of this means. Really, I just like the soft blanket.

But I think I don’t mind the new kid anyway. I mean, it hasn’t done anything to me! I’m doing just fine. I still get my food. I still get the belly scratches and the walks. I still have to perform my stupid tricks to get the beef-flavored treats. And at the end of the day, who’s the one that still sleeps in the big bed between them and tucked in all cozy-like in the pillows?

Me.