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Marvelous Madelyn Archive

January 6, 2014

Madelyn’s First Day Of Preschool

by Alison Friedman in Madelyn & Friends, Marvelous Madelyn, Mommy's Musings, Preschool University

Twas the night before Madelyn’s first day of preschool, and all through the house, a mommy was stirring — BECAUSE SHE’S A NEUROTIC WOODY ALLEN MOTHER WHO NEEDED TO BE SURE THAT HER DAUGHTER’S FIRST DAY OF PRESCHOOL EVER WAS THE MOST MEMORABLE EXPERIENCE OF HER LIIIIIIIIIFE.

Mama’s got issues. That’s OK. It means I care ~~too much~~. A lot.

The night before school, Bryan and I talked up the whole shebang.

“You sing songs ALL the time. You’re basically getting two-for-one voice lessons at Jewish preschool. Don’t you want to be the next Barbra Streisand?!”

“You’re going to make so many new friends! You LOVE playing with friends! It’s never too soon to start campaigning for Homecoming Queen Esther!”

“You get to eat lunch that we make together! Here, Madelyn. Let’s put in all your favorite foods like carrot sticks and organic apples, and baby broccolinis. Right? RIGHT?!?!”

We actually did make lunch together and it was fun! Normally I dread making lunches, especially my own for when I go to work AT school, but Madelyn and I teamed up. She held the bag and counted the carrot sticks as I dropped them in. And I gave her the choice of strawberry jelly or grape jelly on her sandwich. It was such a team effort.

And then I lost my marbles when I put her cute little owl lunch bag in the fridge. Because preschool!

“Oh, hi Cool Whip and eggs and grapes! I’m new here and I’m a hoot!”

So hard to believe that we have crossed the line into this little category. For months, BabyCenter has been sending me emails about Madelyn’s development because, you know, the Internet gods know everything, and the same folks who updated me on the produce in my belly, and the infant in my arms, and the toddler on my… everything… the same folks have been sending me emails subjected “Your Preschooler” since August. Eh eh — not so fast, Internet gods! My Preschooler was not in preschool because I felt she needed a little more time at home (i.e., we bought a house and we were po’!) but now those emails are like Shakira’s hips: they don’t lie! My little poppyseed has become a preschooler! I was so excited to watch her grow, make new friends (for all of us!), and, well, for me to get a manicure at 10 a.m. But yes, the whole thing was bittersweet because there’s something so unbabyish about taking your toddler to preschool. Madelyn is almost closer to kindergarten than she is to newbornhood. Crazy, that tick-tock of time.

My alarm was set to go off way too early on Preschool Day. Madelyn and I are used to sleeping until at least 8:30 or 9:00, so I was having major anxiety about what our morning would be like. Neither of us are sunnyside up when it’s time to wake before we’re ready, so naturally, just like you do the night before a super early flight and you have to get to the airport, I woke up every hour in a panic: “IS IT TIME?! HAVE I OVERSLEPT? DID WE SKIP PRESCHOOL AND ARE WE NOW AT COLLEGE?!”

I got myself up, managed to put on makeup and a bra — both things I usually don’t do before 10 — and then woke up Sleeping Beauty who was not impressed with the whole exercise. But I reminded her it was Preschool Day and she smiled super big. We got dressed, did our hair, and Madelyn was in a great mood. She had breakfast and we went over all the wonderful things she could expect.

Just before we left, we took The Picture in front of the door. Isn’t that a rite of a passage in and of itself? I’ve seen all my friends do this for years, and while I was tempted to do the same for Princeton before his first night of Obedience School, I skipped it and waited to be able to do this with my own (human) child. Today was the day!

Thankfully, she cooperated for the camera. Lately, she’s anti-paparazzi and has mastered giving “the hand.” She was in such a good mood, she posed and giggled and showed off her lunch box!

Memo to Alison in 11 years: This is for sure going in the Bat Mitzvah montage

Madelyn's First Day of Preschool

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Off we went to school where she frolicked through the playground to enter the bright and cheery classroom with her equally bright and cheery teachers and then it happened:

The Leg Hug.

Her arms gripped her Daddy’s leg like a hippie’s on a tree, and she would. not. let. go. OK, OK, so, she’s a little bit of a leg hugger and is usually slow to warm when entering a room anyway. No big whoop. We’ll ignore this behavior and get to know the room and the teachers and all that. Well, she gave the side eye to anyone who even so much as breathed the same oxygen as her in the room, and didn’t show any signs of unlatching.

Finally, one of the teachers got her to at least sit in a chair and she looked at the play dough while the other kids made museum-quality works of art out of it, but hey, at least she looked at it.

“Maybe if I look at this long enough, it’ll do something.”

We had done all of our admin duties and made our way over to her for the kiss-off. A quick “goodbye and love you,” sealed with a kiss, and a promise that I’d be back in a little bit (three hours) seemed to do the trick. No tears. No hysterics. It was a perfect morning after all.

Love my big girl!!

We drove off campus, Bryan and I looked at the “Schedule” the teachers gave us detailing a typical day of Madelyn’s class and we wished we were two, and then we went our separate ways for the day. I felt 28.7 pounds lighter when I realized I had a whole 2.5 hours ahead of me to do whatever I wanted and efficiently.

Bryan’s going to propose this new schedule to his boss at work.

Until 10:45 when I got a phone call that I should return to school. School gets out at noon.

Apparently, Madelyn had a bit of a roller coaster morning after we’d left. Thankfully, it wasn’t the tantrum kind, but she was sad and definitely asking for her mommy over and over again. She saw her beloved Mommy & Me teacher on the playground and had a hard time accepting the fact that she flew that coop, and was in a new nest with new wonderful teachers and new sweet friends. That adjustment must be hard for toddlers — to be at the same school, but in a different class with a different format and different faces — so I totally get it.

I came back in the classroom to find the kiddies eating lunch — and so well, I might add! — and Madelyn was a happy little girl. She was told that I was coming back and she perked back up. We ate lunch together and I was so impressed with her independence and the routines in the classroom which, as I could see, the seasoned teachers had well oiled.

Lunch time success!

We finished up the day with some circle time and some songs. I made sure she felt comfortable having me there, but didn’t want to participate too much and convey a Mommy & Me-type setting for her, so I gave her short cues based on her teachers’ directions to the whole class, and she settled in really nicely.

Madelyn participates at circle time at the end of the day!

The end of the day came quickly, and Madelyn was in a great mood. Despite the rocky transition in the first half, I’d say the day as a whole was successful.

I’m so proud of my little preschooler and know we have many years of memories to make together in our preschool community. And she sang “Shalom Haverim” so beautifully, that Babs better be shakin’ in her boots.

Comments (2):

Pattie

1/7/2014 8:17 AM

I so look forward to your updates! What a little trooper…MOMMY! haha. New friends, new adventures, growing up. It’s all part of the plan for kiddies and a really hard transition for moms! Book those mornings! Lots of mani/pedi’s, lunches, movies (if they aren’t too long!) Enjoy your mommy time, while Madelyn grows to love school!
Love you all….
Mimi

1/6/2014 10:02 PM

Dear Sweet Madelyn! I’m so happy that you had a busy & fun day in your new pre-school class. I love your schedule of activities & that you will have very clean hands. 😉 It will be fun/funny to look back on this big event/milestone & see that you are still friends or even went all through your school years with some of your new classmates.
Starting with today, I can’t wait to be able to go to lots of your school events!!
I love you! <3
Mimi

November 28, 2013

On The First Night of Hanukkah…

by Alison Friedman in Marvelous Madelyn, Mommy's Musings

Last night was the first night of Hanukkah and it was also the first time I’ve done my parental duty of buying and wrapping presents. I know my Mother of the Year medal should be taken away immediately for not doing the gifting thing for my own daughter, but I felt that during her first two Hanukkahs, she a) didn’t really need anything and was still digesting goodies from her birthdays only four months before, and b) also didn’t “get it.” The whole routine of lighting candles when the sun goes down and opening a present for eight consecutive nights was beyond her ability to appreciate the entire holiday. We lit candles and she was mesmerized by the flame and of course we celebrated with our extended families on one or two nights of the eight, but our nuclear version of Hanukkah was minimized to candles and a few decorations around the house.

Princeton has always understood and appreciated Pawnukkah.

Well not this year! Hanukkah came back to the Friedman house. Perhaps it was the joy in celebrating in a homey-home with more space and things to decorate. And perhaps we could see that Madelyn finally reached an age where she gets excited about presents and family time. And she also has awareness for commercial products, so it would be fun to give her the gift of Minnie and Ariel and Kitty and other friends — you know, because the real purpose of Hanukkah is to buy into what Target puts on its shelves. Oh, ‘Murica. But what can I say? I am a sucker for seeing joy in my child’s face, and if it means a handful-and-a-half of colorful, pop culture-related presents in ~~December~~ November and December, then I’m all for it.

The Many Faces of Hanukkah Madelyn

Madelyn has also been learning the dreidel song at her preschool class. It’s amazing how going to a class once a week can sink into our little sponge. She sees the dreidels around the house and sings the song. She even requests singing it with her Daddy at the keyboard.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WKcuxin7mZE

Last night was the first night of Hanukkah and I was so excited to do with her what I remember my parents doing with me! We ate dinner… except it was far from traditional. I knew we’d be doing the latkes and the whole shebang in a few days, so I made chicken stir fry. Hey, if we eat Chinese food on Christmas, why can’t we do it on Hanukkah?

We set up the candles on the menorah and then as we were about to turn off the lights and gather Madelyn for the prayer, we realized we both had mushy brains and couldn’t remember the melody! Thanks to Rabbi Google, we got back on track, and took turns bringing Madelyn to the menorah as we lit the candles. She was totally into it, and Bryan and I were huge puddles of pride.

As we held her together, she took one last look at the candles, looked back at us, pursed her lips, and began to blow. The last time she was so close to fire, it was her birthday. The innocence of children during the holidays is deliciously cute.

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Thankfully, all the candles stayed lit. Having enough oil for eight days? Miracle shmiracle. It’s all about the resistance of a toddler’s blow.

Then we told Madelyn she could pick out one present from the bunch. She stood in front of her choices, put her finger to her chin and went “Hmmmm… Let’s see….” and I quietly giggled over the important life decision in front of her that I so totally remember from my own childhood: Which present to open tonight.

Eeny meeny miney mo!

With no method to her madness, she picked a funny looking present — the one that was hardest for me to wrap — and ripped in. It was an assortment of little toys I picked up in the “stocking stuffer” aisle of Target, actually. A bunch of little Disney things: an Ariel light-up toy, a small Ariel figurine, a Minnie Mouse AND Disney Princess camera, and a Disney Princess soft ball to throw around the house. Kids are so funny when they open presents. Instead of taking each one out to see what’s next, she’d take out one item and begin to play with it, not caring that there was more to see inside. We had to keep reminding her that there was more!

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I think her favorite from the lot are her two little cameras. She pushes the button, it makes a shutter sound, and then it displays a picture of a princess or Minnie Mouse. It’s like a modern day ViewMaster, remember those? She thinks she’s taking actual pictures, though, and she tells us to pose, puts the camera up in the air — the way she sees us snapping away at her with our iPhones — and then puts the camera to her cheek to hear the shutter click. It’s the worst shooting technique I’ve ever seen, but it’s adorable and it totally makes sense. To her. Who knows? Maybe this silly little Hanukkah toy from 2013 will inspire her future career as a photographer?

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There are seven nights left, including a few family get togethers in the mix, and I can’t wait to see what delights her each night. I hope we are creating special memories and traditions for Madelyn that she’ll remember with joy when she is an adult. And I really hope Costco still carries Yoshidas because it’s the best thing for stir fry ever.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xp4E-zmqHQM

November 14, 2013

It’s My Potty and I’ll Pee If I Want To

by Alison Friedman in Marvelous Madelyn, Mommy's Musings

You know what doesn’t piss me off? A 2.3 year-old who asks, “Mummy, may I please go to the loo?” Ok, well Madelyn doesn’t speak with a little girl English accent, but how cute would that be? And I also think we need to start saying “loo” much more often in ‘Murica.

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Madelyn does, however, tell me: “Sissy! Potty! Mama! Sissy!” It’s more of a demand than a question — she WILL go sissy! Sissy! In the potty! Potty, Mama, NOW.

So who am I to deny my little ready toddler a diaper-free life?

I am a busy mom with a fear of public restrooms. You should see me work a restroom anywhere outside my house: I break out of there without touching a thing with my own bare hands, so you better believe that managing a curious and gropey two-year-old in a bathroom gives me anxiety to the ceiling.

Therefore, I really like diapers. They’re self-containing. I’m in control. And oh, they smell so good (pre-soiled. Duh. I love that fresh-out-of-the-box powdery, sweet, baby smell).

I’ve decided that at the moment, Madelyn is potty training me. She began showing an interest in the potty about four months ago when she began stripping all the time. At first, I thought maybe it was just a slight leaning toward her future career, but then I realized that the clothes and diaper would come off when she was wet or wet+, which made for a really fun clean-up job (think: gorilla. zoo. poop.). It dawned on me that Madelyn did not like being in her own waste, so I bought her a potty chair to try whenever she felt like it.

At first, she sat on it, fully clothed, and just talked away, playing with toys and singing songs. Then she started sitting her baby dolls on the potty and started to narrate what they were doing: “Deedee (baby) sissy on potty!” This told me she was fascinated with the whole potty concept and she’d been paying attention to her family members who allowed her front row seats as a spectator for grown-up potty events.

Hi, Baby! Urine good company!

Then one night before bed, I asked her if she’d like to try to make sissy on the potty. I expected nothing. But sure enough, a few tinkle-tinkles later, and she looked up at me, shocked, and we had a party. A potty party! I praised her like crazy, we did high-fives, I gave her a zillion hugs and kisses, my voice went up 32 octaves, and we danced it out. It was a really fun first experience. And then my instinct was to reinforce it positively with an M&M because, really, if you gave me an M&M anytime I did something you wanted me to do, I would never not do what you want me to do!

I realize how Pavlovian this is and I was one click away from treating her like a dog at obedience school, but the M&M was both celebratory and behavior enforcement. Madelyn learned very quickly that a successful sissy would earn her one M&M in the color of her choice (99% of the time, her pick is “weh-wo”).

These days, Madelyn has been making sissy in the potty about three times a day. She’s still wearing diapers, and we are not close to giving them up entirely, but she’s become extremely comfortable with the whole routine. I usually don’t even ask her if she has to go anymore. She usually just tells me except for this week when I was cleaning my own bathroom, and she saw me attach a new roll of TP. Her eyes got wide, her voice excitedly said, as if she was just reminded, “Oh!” and ran out of my bathroom. I figured she was going to play with one of her baby dolls, but I heard her grunting and talking to herself as she was trying to remove her jeggings and diaper and I walked in on a very satisfied Madelyn who was mid-tinkle on her potty. She’s making connections and it’s really amazing to witness.

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I think we’re probably a month or two away from battening down the hatches and doing an intense 3-day potty boot camp. I think that will be the finishing touch to get her out of diapers and I like that she will already be so comfortable with the whole potty exercise. Sometimes I question if I’m doing this right — as if there’s only one way or one correct answer — but I go with my mommy gut and tell myself that this current set-up is teaching Madelyn independence at her own pace and hey, look, no public restroom fiascos to deal with.

I know she’s not going to be walking down the aisle with a diaper underneath her wedding dress, and I know she’s going to be entering preschool with a pretty strong sense of how it all works, so I’m not living in any great fear that I must get on the potty training train OR ELSE, OMG.

We read a cute book called The Potty Book that she requests every night before bed and narrates all the illustrations. She’s super stoked about the idea of undies and has already decided that she wants Diddie Rouse and Ariel on them when it’s her turn to wear them. And don’t get me started on the M&Ms as it’s her new favorite food group.

I think she’ll master making sissy on the potty without the diaper safety net pretty quickly and soon enough, we’ll be tip-toeing through the public restrooms while I have my daughter’s hands restrained in a straitjacket and a hurricane of antibacterial spray surrounding her like the polar opposite of the dude from “Peanuts” with the dirt cloud constantly around him (does anyone ever know what that kid’s name is?)

And then we’ll get to do it all over again with the poops. Shit.

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Comments (1):

Mimi

11/14/2013 3:48 PM

Madelyn, you are so smart!
Just a warning—be prepared that when you are in a public restroom, not only when you’re with Mommy, but also when you’re with Mimi, you will hear these words, “Don’t touch anything! Don’t touch the door! Don’t touch the walls!” many times. 😉
Love you! xoxox

November 11, 2013

And On Mondays We Do Ballet

by Alison Friedman in Classes, Marvelous Madelyn, Mommy's Musings

Just after Madelyn turned one, she really chippered up around music. As soon as her body was ready, she started to move, bouncing her legs and flapping her arms. Soon the head bob played a big part in her dancing, and by the time she finished up two gigs as flower girl in two different weddings six months apart, she was essentially a baby version of Beyonce.

I knew I’d sign her up for dance lessons, but the local studios don’t start taking kids until they’re about three. Also, they’re really expensive and I really don’t think her intense ABT training needs to commence at two years old. I did a search in our local parks and rec and found a mommy & me ballet class. The price was right, the commitment was reasonable, and even I’d get to ~~train like a pro~~ make a fool out of myself, too. Plus, how hard could it be?

And come on, have you seen toddler ballet clothes? They are SO cute.

Mommy circa 1987 and Madelyn for-sure 2013 modeling pretty ballet clothes before going to class.

The week before class started, our sweet friend who’s a local dance teacher with the cutest daughters ever gave us several pairs of dance shoes, including ballet shoes in Madelyn’s current size. It was so perfect! I got her a leotard at Target and knew she could wear tights we already had.

I, on the other hand, lost sleep the night before the first class because I don’t have proper ballet shoes except for the old lady, knock-off Isotoner slippers my grandma gave me after she cleaned out her closet (“Here, Ali. For your dancing. These will help you with the steps.” Thanks?…). And I certainly don’t have any official ballet costumes (they didn’t have adult tutus at Target), and would I have to wear my hair in a bun? Because I really don’t look good without my hair down. Of course I wasn’t too afraid of the toddlers giving me the eye. And the teacher, I’m sure, would be very accepting and understanding of a mommy’s busy schedule and her ballet clothing inventory. It was the other moms, of course, that I was dressing for, and I didn’t want to be THAT mom; the one who went all-out with the ballet attire, but also not at all dialed in to the cause.

So I went with my regular mom uniform: black yoga pants, an everyday shirt, and hair half up. I felt it suggested movement and a familiarity with physical fitness without trying too hard. You know, totally a naturale.

I talked up ballet for 48 hours before the class so that by the time we had to be there, Madelyn would be stoked for the new environment.

The first thing I did was breathe a sigh of relief that some moms wore legit ballet shoes and some went barefoot. Most of them also wore my same mom uniform and one or two were in jeans and a top like they’d been out doing other things with, ya know, a life. (Oh you mean this isn’t an all day Broadway chorus workshop? Phew!). I did slip off the faux Isotoners once I saw the bare feet option. Sorry, Grandma.

Madelyn was shy, at first, not willing to do much. She sat on the sidelines and watched, but since it wasn’t Mommy & Me Watching Ballet and we were supposed to actually be doing what the teacher told us, I modeled the behavior I wanted her to have and she just sat back and watched me get my ballet on. So, me, and a bunch of moms and their cooperative daughters and the teacher; it mostly sucked when I had no partner to stretch and sway and do tippy-toe circles with.

Finally, Madelyn warmed up enough to leave her post, but instead of joining the group, she ran around the room like a banshee. She literally galloped across the floor, marking her territory in all four corners of the room with squeals and very loud “singing.” I tried to scoop her up, but she was like a puddle and would not cooperate.

I was really thrilled that I was paying for Madelyn to pretty much do the exact opposite of the class: It was all “mommy,” no “me,” and basically everything but pretty ballet movement. I could see it right then and there: The Toddler Marla Hooch, they’d call her. Ugh.

I’ll tell ya what. I got a sweet workout and my glutes were sore for days.

I spoke to the teacher after class, apologized profusely, and she told me not to worry and it was normal because it’s all completely new to the kids: the space, the structure, the movement. Apparently, a strong enjoyment for dancing to “Blurred Lines,” (or, “Hey Hey Hey” as Madelyn calls it) does not a ballerina make. At least, automatically.

But she told me not to quit, to come back, and eventually she’d get used to the environment.

So we came back.

Madelyn and Lovey perform lifts a la pas de deux. (yes, we speak French now).

Madelyn “chassés” across the floor… with Lovey.

How do you say “monkey in the middle” in French? Because we also play that in ballet in order to coerce the toddlers to stand on tippy toes.

Madelyn improvises eighth position.

And each week, Madelyn improved immensely. Her banshee portrayal only lasted that one class, and each class she participated more and more. The only problem is that halfway through the 50-minute class, she gets tired because it’s her nap time, but she’s been a real trooper and has been able to sleepily carry on, even if a little clumsy. She sometimes gets a little shy about participating, but the teacher said I should do whatever makes her feel comfortable, so Madelyn ends up doing a lot of partner dancing with her pink Lovey. And I feel like it’s the best deal ever at a 3-for-the-price-of-1 bargain.

I continue to wear my Lululemon pants and bare feet, the moms are super nice and their girls are all darling, and Madelyn makes huge steps, or, pas de marché, each week as her moves improve.

We practice at home — tippy toes, butterfly arms, sways, curtsy, chassé, pretty fingers, marching — and she really seems to enjoy it. I’ve also noticed that it’s strengthening her core and leg muscles, which her physical therapist has even noticed!

I hope Madelyn continues to want to dance, and while I won’t push her to do activities she doesn’t really feel, I think dance is a beautiful and important way to build confidence and have fun, two super important focuses I want for my daughter.

Our second session of classes begins next week and I didn’t hesitate to sign up again. These “mommy & me” type classes only last for so long and soon she’ll be going to school, so we have to enjoy them together as long as we can. I love watching her blossom in class and ya know, these old glutes of mine are looking pretty good.

It’s really hard to pick our favorite ballet move.

October 14, 2013

Patchy Days Are Here Again

by Alison Friedman in Halloween Time, Madelyn & Friends, Marvelous Madelyn

Hard to believe that we’re going into Madelyn’s third Halloween. Even at two months old, we took her to the pumpkin patch to get traditional photos started even though she had no idea what was going on and couldn’t do any of the fun pumpkin patch activities.

Last year was different when we took her to Underwood Family Farms where she seemed to have an appreciation for her surroundings and could toddle through the pumpkin fields by herself and trot after the animals in the petting corral.

Pumpkins change. Hair grows. Cuter happens.

This year, Madelyn basically owned the place. We took her back to Underwood Farms and she seemed to thoroughly enjoy and understand all the aspects of fun on the farm. She pointed to things she recognized and made sure to show us every single pumpkin, or in Madelynese, tun-tun.

Where will she land next year?

It was a hot Saturday; one of those tricky days that appeared cold from the bedroom window and sent chills through our house walls, but then turned out to be sunny, bright, and warm. We shvitzed our way through the long line to get in and Madelyn picked through the easy grab-and-go pumpkins in the crates.

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We only had a couple hours to spend at the farm and Bryan was feeling a little ghoulish himself, so I was extremely goal-oriented as we made our way through the peopled grounds.

We headed toward the petting corral so ~~I could hug and cuddle every single available animal~~ Madelyn could see her fuzzy friends. She loved the goats and chased around this one sandy-colored little guy, calling out, “Hi, Goat! Hi, Goat! Hi, Goat!” She saw a chicken and had a conversation in full-on, fluent “Bock bock.” (She also says “Bock bock” to her dinner, soooo…). And Madelyn loved the sheep, despite offering salutations to the “Shit.” (FYI: letters P and T are completely interchangeable). I would say the petting corral was a success.