Mommy’s Musings Archive

July 29, 2011

Something’s Ready In the State of Pregnant

by Alison Friedman in Mommy's Musings

We are down to the wire, people! I mean, like, there’s hardly even any wire left, that’s how down we are.

I haven’t really done many doctor-y type posts because I figure that’s usually boring stuff and no one really cares. I mean, getting into our neurotic heads is much more entertaining, right? Well, this is a combo of head neuroses and obstetrics.

I’m 39 weeks today. For those keeping score, it’s one week exactly from the due date and for the past two weeks, Dr. Fiiiine has mentioned at our weekly appointments that she does not think we’ll make it to our August 5th due date. That means Baby Friedman is coming “any day now.”

We are on pins and needles anticipating every hiccup she makes and stitch of pain I feel. People keep asking me if I’ve had contractions and I shrug to indiciate “I don’t think so,” to which everyone replies with, “OH YOU’LL KNOW.”

I’ve been experiencing a lot of Braxton Hicks contractions which are actually really annoying. I used to like them, but I’m definitely irritated by them now. They’re such a tease! It’s like, c’mon already, if you’re going to contract, at least contract with a purpose! They’re benign and painless, but the tightening is there… and for what reason? Makes no sense to me.

For two weeks in a row, I’ve been 2 centimeters dilated and 50% effaced. I know this doesn’t equate to anything as far as timing goes, but it definitely means that things are revving up. As far as when, who knows? It’s driving me nuts because I can’t plan or calendar my week. Lunch with a girlfriend? Uh, maybe??? Getting a pedicure? Perhaps??? If you know me well, you know this drives me bat shit crazy. I like to plan, plan, plan. But everything has to be up in the air because, as Dr. Fiiiine said, this baby is coming any day now.

When I left her office this week, she said “See you next week or sooner.” I mean, sooner? Really? I guess we’re really on the homestretch now that she uses words like “any day” and “sooner.”

So what’s going on in my head? Everyone seems to want this baby out, especially the men. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not dreading meeting my child, but I’m also in no rush. I know she has to come out (ouch!) and I know it’ll happen when she’s ready. In the meantime, I’ve sort of reached this weird and numbing shutdown. I’m almost kind of catatonic. Going through the motions of the day. Nodding my head; quiet with my words. When I self-analyze, I think this is my way of just breathing through my nerves because, yes, I’m nervous and a little fearful of the unknown, and I also don’t want to put too much mental pressure on the details of this baby’s arrival. I’m just trying to let it… be. It’s not that I’m in denial — there’s no denying Mount Rushmore protruding from my abdomen or the dull pains in my back — but I’m (for once!) just going with the flow. Like everyone else, the anticipation is killing me so I’ve chosen not to anticipate. At least not actively.

IMG_1491

I look at myself in the mirror and I don’t even recognize the reflection! My tummy is so huge! It blows my mind that skin can stretch that much (and leave me with no marks, thankyouverymuch!) 🙂 I look at my self and think, “Gosh, that looks like it hurts!” And it does. Sleeping is lousy, if sleep happens at all, and I’m a little cranky. I know, I know, it’s nothing compared to what’s about to take place! But I can’t wait until I can sleep on my tummy again! Left side-only sleeping is not at all comfortable and my poor body is angry with the extra weight crushing my neck, shoulders, hips and knees. Bryan constantly gives me back rubs, but unfortunately, the pain wins out after the back rub is over.

So, between the regular Braxton Hicks, the thinning-out, and the dilation, I think we’re definitely on our way to seeing a baby very, very soon. Anyone want to take bets on when this little girl is going to make her official debut?

Comments (4):
  1. Marilyn Hollander
    8/1/2011 2:57 PM

    BELIEVE ME when I say I know how annoying the Braxton-Hicks are, but try to think of them as your uterus “training” for the big event. Like passive sit-ups almost. I don’t know if this will help, but the only baby I didn’t have them with was Danny, and he was also my only C-section. Maybe that’s what comes of having a lazy uterus beforehand. I don’t know, but it’s something to think about when you think there’s no reason for them. Hang in there, my friend!

  2. Char
    7/30/2011 6:14 AM

    Oh Alison, you are definitely ready! I feel your pain about the planning thing and that just gets worse when the baby actually does make her grand entrance because your whole life will revolve areound her schedule. So my prediction for her arrival is this Wednesday, August 3rd. Why you ask? Because it’s my birthday!! Haha….thinking about you girl and rooting you on!

  3. Mom/ Sharon/Mimi-to-be
    7/29/2011 2:20 PM

    ?”Live from the News Womb!” I love love love how you sub-titled this blog with this facebook status heading. That’s hilarious. LOLing very hard right now. Your journalism degree really paid off with this humorous comment. So clever on so many levels.
    I am just as much on pins and needles as you are. I am trying to be patient, but it’s all I can think about. However, my hair is colored, cut and back in a controllable style so that my granddaugher doesn’t get scared when she meets her Mimi. 😉 I’m ready little girl, why arent’ you!?

  4. Mindy
    7/29/2011 12:13 PM

    You are so beautiful in this picture (and always). I can’t wait to “meet” little Friedman, most likely via FB 😉

July 28, 2011

Cloudy With A Chance of Baby Showers

by Alison Friedman in Madelyn & Friends, Mommy's Musings, Pregnancy

It’s July now. Sunny, hot, and dry. But what was the weather like in June? It was full of showers. No, not wet, umbrella-bearing showers. Baby showers!

I was lucky enough to be surrounded by some pretty amazing women throughout the month of June who seem to like this soon-to-be Friedman Baby a lot! When it comes to good company, yummy food, and baby talk, I don’t say no.

The fabulous group of teachers and staff at Walnut Elementary School came together for a lunchtime shower filled with good conversation and yummy cake. They are such a great bunch and I was so lucky to not only student teach in kindergarten at this school, but work with the 1st graders in reading and math and teach art school-wide. I will miss working with everyone and learning under their expertise. I’m a lucky almost-mom, yes, but I’m also a lucky teacher!





My super fun and sweet sister-in-law, Alison, and our creative and thoughtful cousin, Chrissy, planned a perfect afternoon at my mother-in-law Ellen’s house. It was a beautiful day! The house looked great, the games were really fun (really!!), and the company was filled with some of our Friedman Family Favorites! I was so touched by everyone’s kindness and can’t wait for Baby Friedman to meet all of Ellen’s friends and family. She’s lucky to have such a great inner-circle of ladies who have known me only a small amount of time, but have embraced me as part of the gang! I thought it was so special that our daughter’s only Auntie helped put together such a lovely day. I know that this kid will be surrounded by love, but Auntie Alison is definitely going to top everyone else in the love department. It’ll be nice for our baby to have such a fun and, well, entertaining family member and they can claim each other as their own!









Speaking of the aunt and niece relationship, my Aunt Laura and my mom’s childhood friend Angela co-hosted a quilt-themed baby shower at El Caballero Country Club and it was threaded together beautifully! My sorority sisters and best friends from college came to be with me and it was so fun to see and reconnect with girlfriends from other parts of my life, like camp, high school, and the wedding planning days. Celebrating with family friends and ladies related to my mom’s side of the tree was also special, since they’ve been with me throughout all my milestones. Angela and Aunt Laura organized a quilt-making center, where everyone contributed a piece of fabric that will be made into a quilt as a memento from this amazing time in my life. I can’t wait to see the finished piece! Crumbs cupcakes in a zillion different flavors were arranged into a quilt pattern and no one left craving any sweets! The day was so enjoyable and I appreciate the memory more than words can express.

My talented cousin Sara of Sara Marie Photography, created this slideshow from the photos she shot!





Part of the fun of this pregnancy has been sharing it with my cousin, Jaimie. Our due dates are 3 weeks apart and I’ve enjoyed comparing notes! We’ve always had a great relationship but we’ve always been so different. She’s tall. I’m short. She’s blonde. I’m brunette. She does sciencey things. I … don’t. But we are now going through something together that’s the same and I can’t wait until her son and my daughter can play and grow up together! So it was even cooler when our Aunt Debbie, the SoCal Martha Stewart, planned a luncheon for our side of the family at the Cheesecake Factory in Marina del Rey. We sat outside on a gorgeous sunny afternoon, played games, chatted, scratched Lottery tickets, opened presents, munched, and shared stories about pregnancies, babies, and growing up. It was absolutely perfect. Jaimie and I were lucky to share this day together and we had the best time!







I’ve also been sharing the pregnancy ride with one of my favorite gals from our theater family! Becky and I are also due weeks apart, and she’s expecting a little girl, too! Becky is someone I’ve always admired, not only as a choreographer, but as a person. She’s so kind and smart and thoughtful and she and her husband, George, are going to be amazing parents. Bryan and I are excited to have this parenting adventure with them! Welles Miller, one of the coolest and sweetest theater moms ever threw us a Hot Mama Shower! This was a wild party complete with spiked tea (not for Becky and me) and a roundtable reading of “Go the F*ck to Sleep” which is too entertaining when performed by 50 of your theater friends. Welles didn’t miss a beat: fun games, onesie and bib decorating, food from our favorite restaurant, Viva La Pasta, and a marathon of gifts that were so organized! The Baby Daddies joined the party after a day of golf, and we all had a blast!








So when I say I’m surrounded by so many fantastic people in my life, I’m not kidding. From Bryan’s side of the family to my mom’s side to my dad’s side to our theater friends and my teacher friends, this kid is going to be showered with even more love after she gets here. There’s no umbrella large enough, and I’m definitely okay with that. And trust me, the showers of love made me feel a steady and stormy downpour of appreciation and gratitude.

Thank you!

Comments (1):
  1. Auntie Alison
    7/30/2011 9:38 AM

    Thanks for the shout-out!! The pictures look awesome! I CAN’T WAIT FOR BABY!

July 22, 2011

Big Girls DO Cry

by Alison Friedman in Mommy's Musings, Pregnancy

This morning, it happened. I turned into the C word. Ew, get your head out of the gutter. The C word, in the land of pregnancy, is “crazy.” Or, more clinical, probably: hormonal. For the love of all things pituitary, there I was, driving in my car with sobby, snotty tears streaming down my face. And why?

Because of a song! One that I had never even given a moment’s consideration in the times I’d heard it in the past.

So there I was, minding my own business and driving to lunch on the 101 and I heard “Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You” and as I listened to the words, I bawled! And it wasn’t even the real Frankie Valli singing with The Four Seasons. I was listening to “Jersey Boys” because not only am I apparently an emotional wreck, but, newsflash, I’m a huge theater nerd! So anyway, there I am listening to a showtune cover of a du-wop boy band and having an Oprah moment.

And I realize I’ve heard this song a zillion times. And then I realized even further that this song is usually associated with weddings or first loves or big fancy marriage proposals. But here I am thinking about my little girl. It was weird but then I had an epiphany: Do you know how many times the word “baby” is in the lyrics? I mean, really, it’s like overkill for a 38-week pregnant lady. It’s actually about 21 times because of all the chorus repeats. But, as crazy as it sounds, it totally works as a love song to a new little girl.

Even though I haven’t seen her yet, I know she’ll just be too good to be true and I won’t be able to take my eyes off of her. And after 10 long months of carrying her, I do want to hold her so much. Every lyric just lined up so nicely with how I’m feeling about our daughter who’s due any day, and I’ll admit, I felt like wannabe Frankie, John Lloyd Young, was totally complimenting my kid through my Jetta’s stereo, calling her a pretty baby and all. I answered back like a prayer lady in a Southern Baptist church: Mmmm hmmm, sing it!

I dried my eyes in time for lunch, transformed back to a normal person, and carried on with my day. But now I know I have a new song to love and a new reason to love it. During the drive, I had mini daydreams and visions of being up with the baby at night in her room, gliding her to sleep, and telling her all about the adventures we have in store. Because just as much as she needs us to thrive, we’re excited to need her in our lives. It’s amazing what music can do for the soul.

And no, we’re not naming her “Sherry.”

You’re just too good to be true
Can’t take my eyes off of you
You’d be like heaven to touch
I wanna hold you so much
At long last love has arrived
And I thank God I’m alive
You’re just too good to be true
Can’t take my eyes off of you

Pardon the way that I stare
There’s nothing else to compare
The sight of you leaves me weak
There are no words left to speak
But if you feel like I feel
Please let me know that it’s real
You’re just too good to be true
Can’t take my eyes off of you

I love you baby and if it’s quite all right
I need you baby to warm the lonely nights
I love you baby, trust in me when I say
Oh pretty baby, don’t bring me down I pray

Oh pretty baby, now that I’ve found you stay
And let me love you baby, let me love you

You’re just too good to be true
Can’t take my eyes off of you
You’d be like heaven to touch
I wanna hold you so much
At long last love has arrived
And I thank God I’m alive
You’re just too good to be true
Can’t take my eyes off of you

July 12, 2011

A Chore I Don’t Mind

by Alison Friedman in Mommy's Musings, Pregnancy

Dear Baby Girl,
On Sunday, I did your first load of laundry. I normally really don’t like doing laundry. Actually, that’s not true. There’s something really fun about sorting all the clothes and towels and underwear, but the act of carrying it up and down the stairs and dealing with the machines in the hot garage is not fun. Oh, and don’t get me started on putting it away! But, it’s always worth it to have an empty basket and fresh clothes to wear. But I digress. Get used to it. Mommy does that a lot.

Anyway, I did your first load of laundry and I enjoyed it. I loved it. Your clothes and blankets from all the people that already love you were so perfect and pristine, but needed to be washed so they’d be soft and snuggly for your delicate skin. I gathered up all your newborn clothes, blankets, socks, and burp cloths and brought them down for their very first trip to the washing machine. I filled up the machine with water, poured in my first encounter of Dreft and got a lovely whiff of its powdery and gentle fragrance, and inspected each item as I dropped it into the water. Little onesie. Tiny sock. Bright burp cloth. After the whole load went into the machine, I asked the laundry gods to be nice to each of your garments and keep them safe in the cool, gentle cycle.

About an hour later, I came back to put your first load of laundry in the dryer. One by one, I pulled out each damp item, inspected it to make sure it survived its first swirl of laundering, and then placed then in the drying machine. Normally, with my own clothes, I barely look at them and toss them in crossing my fingers that the old t-shirt or towel actually makes it inside the dryer. But with your things, I care more. Your things can’t touch the garage floor. Your things can’t be tangled up. Your things must have a safe arrival as they start the next leg of their journey to being worn by you.

By the time it was time to take your clothes out of the dryer, I was really tired and Daddy came to pick them up, fill the basket, and bring it upstairs. We sat in your room together as we stared at how tiny all your things are. It was a relief to know that nothing shrank horribly and no colors bled disastrously. We stared into a basket of your clothes that had never met your body, but are now ready to dress you.

I sorted each item and thought about all the other clothes you’ll have that I’ll get to launder and sort. Your baby naming dress at the temple. Your first dance leotard. Your first first-day-of-school outfit. Your first school play costume. Your first uniform for a sport or organization. Your first school dance outfit. Your first class t-shirt. Your first first-date ensemble. Your first prom dress. Your first college sweatshirt. Your wedding gown.

And I know laundry won’t always be fun. You’re going to poop and spit up and get pureed carrots all over your adorable things. At school, you’ll lose your sweatshirt on the playground or trade jackets with a friend that will result in two pissed off moms. When you’re a teenager, you’re going to leave your clothes all over the floor and not put them away, and we’ll probably have a few fights about it. But still, even with these not-so-fun laundry experiences, the act of washing your clothes now, preparing for the person we’ll soon be meeting, and dressing you in all of your cute outfits, I’m more than excited for your poops and trades and fights.

So, little girl, soon you will be making your arrival into the world in your birthday suit, but you have a closet and chest of drawers that will welcome you home and provide you with many memorable moments. And as an adult, you’ll look back on your baby pictures and revisit those token moments in a special outfit like Osh Kosh overalls or a Dodgers onesie. And I will have washed them with love and anticipation of seeing you in them.

Love,
Mommy

Comments (2):
  1. Wendy
    7/12/2011 5:41 PM

    Totally made me cry. And I just did my munchkin’s laundry last night…perfect timing!

  2. Aunt Pattie
    7/12/2011 4:22 PM

    Laundry has NEVER made me cry…. Until now!

July 11, 2011

Mom’s List About Pregnancy

by Alison Friedman in Mommy's Musings, Pregnancy

I’m reflecting about all the changes I’ve experienced in the past 36 weeks and all the changes that will happen when this pregnancy adventure is over. I actually really enjoy being pregnant despite the discomforts that spilled on toward the end. There are things I will miss, and things I won’t miss! I made a list because that’s what moms do, right?

Things I’ll Miss About Pregnancy:

  • The full head of hair! I rarely shed it and it’s been growing so fast! DON’T STOP!!!
  • Horizontal stripes. I am partly kidding, but I never wore them pre-pregnancy and I think I lose my excuse to wear them post pregnancy with the widening illusion they provide that I certainly don’t need.
  • Exchanging looks of “go us!” with other pregnant women I see out and about.
  • Feeling my daughter’s little kicks and squirms and learning about her personality while she’s inside me. Such a cool connection!
  • The other pregnant women in my life! I have so many friends — and my cousin! — who I’ve experienced pregnancy with (we are all only weeks apart) and I’ve loved sharing all the things we’re feeling.
  • My husband’s hands on my tummy while he connects with his daughter! I’ll even miss his daily analyses of my belly button protrusion.
  • My maternity bathing suit. I like not having to suck in to wear a bikini.
  • My maternity pants. One word: ELASTIC.
  • Eating without a care in the world. Hence the bullet point above.

Things I Won’t Miss About Pregnancy:

  • The back pain! Since the beginning of the 3rd trimester, I’ve been experiencing everything from dull achiness to sharp shooting sciatica-like pains. Sitting, laying, standing: nothing helps!
  • The bladder psych outs of feeling like ohmygoshiHaveToGoSoooooBadGetOutOfMyWayRIGHTNow and then going through the motions of sitting down to pee only to feel: Drip. Drop. What?! That’s it?! What a tease!
  • Seeing my favorite bottle of wine in the fridge from my favorite winery in the Santa Ynez Valley, Brander, and whispering sweet nothings to it like, “Don’t worry, my sweet. We’ll be together again soon.” What a sad song for a sauvignon.
  • The heaviness: my legs, my feet, my belly. Everything feels like I am a Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade balloon with strings pulling me to the ground.
  • Sleepless nights. Okay, you’re laughing because I’m going to have my share of sleepless nights once the baby is here. But the only reason why my nights are sleeples now is because I can’t get comfortable in bed! Nothing feels good and I toss and turn out of frustration. For some reason, sleeplessness due to a crying, hungry baby seems more acceptable. I know, talk to me later.
  • The fear of the unknown: birth. I am becoming increasingly more aware that this baby is going to be coming out of me and very soon, too. I am driving myself insane with fears and apprehension. I know it’s normal since I’m a rookie, but not knowing is almost worse than knowing!
  • Snore throat. This is a sore throat from pregnancy-acquired (I can’t believe I’m admitting this) snoring. I never thought I’d ever be so unladylike, but my bedmate tells me I’ve developed a little purr. I blame a less-than ideal sleep position!
  • Bumping into stuff and having to clear a path for my belly just to get in a car or sit in a restaurant booth. I want my own space back.

Overall, I’ve had a really nice and easy pregnancy. It’s really only been uncomfortable for the past couple weeks, but everything leading up to then has been smooth, anticlimactic, and actually really positive. For the most part, I felt very sexy — not in a “let’s doooooo it” way — but in a confident, female, “I am woman! ROAR!” way. I felt empowered and strong, like I’ve been doing what my body was made to do. That’s quite an accomplishment, because my body was also made to run marathons and eat 1500 calories a day, but I don’t do either of those. But now, at 36 weeks, I think I finally reached my “I’m over it!” breaking point. Thank you for coming, now get out. It’s not that I wish her to come early because I certainly want this baby to cook as long as she needs to inside to be as healthy as possible outside, but I am looking forward to seeing this journey wrap up so I can have my body back and hold my daughter in my arms. And stop snoring.