May 9, 2012

Nine Months!

by Alison Friedman in Marvelous Madelyn, Mommy's Musings, Monthiversaries

Today marks nine months of Madelyn! Starting tomorrow, she will have been out and in our lives longer than in and part of our dreams. Those nine months of pregnancy were (mostly) magical, but these nine months of babyhood have been extremely eye opening and adventurous!

Good morning, America!

I was looking at old videos from the pregnancy before Maddie was born and I stumbled across a very nervous Alison at an ungodly early hour before taking off for the hospital. I listen to this Alison and this Bryan and I barely know them. Ah, how young and ignorant they are! They think they’re going to a hospital to entice a baby to slide out and then go back home 48 hours later and enjoy the pristine nursery in all its pre-Madelyn glory. I find myself laughing at those two people and yelling at the computer: Oh, you guys! You’re going to wait like ALL day for a baby to come and then she won’t and then there’s going to be a dramatic surgery and then you’re not coming home for FOUR days and then when you do, Alison will be worthless while she recovers from an infection and Bryan will have to do ALL the work and by the way, the nursery will never stay clean because when she’s nine months old, Madelyn will crawl everywhere and untidy up all the decor like the dolls and pillows and books by pulling them down so they’re strewn across the carpet and you’ll never have time to clean up after her because you’re too busy running after her. OH YOU GUYS!

That’s what I would say to those two strangers.

So, there we have it. Nine months have gone by and we have a kid who, according to her check up today, weighs 17 pounds and ten ounces, is 28 inches long, and has a head that’s 17.3 inches around. She got a shot (boo!) and was cleared to start drinking less expensive normal formula (yay!). The doc was super impressed with all of her tricks and she’s on target, if not early, with all of her developmental milestones! Proud parents! Swoon!

This month, Madelyn…

  • Has made it her goal to stand up on anything. That means things that don’t allow for standing on. Like, you know, my face. She pulls herself up on everything she can see: walls, furniture, toys, human bodies. She’s a standing exhibitionist. She does it one-handed too and confidence is really kicking in because she’s starting to experiment with “look ma! No hands!” but is followed with a quick tumble that doesn’t even faze her. We are now greeted by a stander in her crib every morning. She’s just so funny! What can I say? My Madelyn is a “stand” up comedian. Nyuk nyuk nyuk.
  • Took her first vacation that required a plane. More on that later, but her first plane trip was not that great. Let’s just say, she failed at earning her young wings, but I don’t really blame her and she made up for her on the return home. Still, she’s a lucky almost 9-month-old to have spent a week in Hawaii! A full recap will OF COURSE make it onto BornFriedman soon! Lots of pictures to sort through.
  • Began babbling like crazy! She makes so many cute sounds. I just love her little voice and never get tired of listening to what she has to say! She can put together consonants and vowels and make up words in her own little language. She has said “da da” and “ma ma” but I’m betting that they are not associated with her Mama and Dada and are just easy sounds to make. But, this is the fun part — listening to her develop speech and communication skills and my inner geek is fascinated by the whole evolution!
  • Learned to make fart sounds and speak Click. It’s silly, but the reason why this is cool is because it’s showing me we can exchange our own dialogue. If she makes the fart sound, which is really more like a raspberry, and then I do it, she’ll do it back and we take turns. The same goes for the click sound she makes with her tongue smacking her gums. If I do it, she’ll do it back and vice versa. And, let’s face it, yes, the monkey-see-monkey-do act is brilliant of her, but really, who doesn’t like it when a baby makes fart sounds? It’s hysterical.
  • Started the beginnings of waving hello and goodbye. She reaches out to whoever is coming or going and is trying to figure out the whole hand part of the wave. I think her fine motor skills are developing in that area, but it’s cool that she gets the motion and the appropriate time to do it. Looks like she already had her eye on the Miss America crown and is practicing that wave!
  • Recognizes Princeton! This may just be my new favorite trick in her book. Obviously, since Princeton is my first-born, he is very, very special to our family. The fact that Madelyn now knows who he is and enjoys his presence is my latest gush. We can say, “Madelyn! Where’s Princeton?” and she’ll either get really excited and flap her arms at the sound of his name or crawl toward him and attempt to touch him. It’s really cute and exactly what a proud parent would want! I think it’s the start of them becoming the best of friends! Princeton, like most dogs, likes his privacy and alone time and finds places to hide out and den all throughout the house. One of his favorite denning spots is under Madelyn’s crib; he can still see out, but he’s protected by the frame. Madelyn’s never cared about him being under there until just today! As she was crawling around her room, she caught Princeton’s eye that was at her level under the crib and she crawled toward him and touched his foot. They definitely had a special sibling moment and I melted.

As always, our greatest joy is watching Madelyn grow and explore. She’s working so hard and practicing all her new skills. She’s on her way to a perfect 10… months. Happy nine months, love bug!

Comments (1):
  1. Mimi
    5/9/2012 11:07 PM

    Dear Sweet Madelyn!
    Happy 9 Months! You are so funny and fun to be around. I just love watching you blossom and thrive like a beautiful flower. I wonder what you’re thinking in that curious, smart & adorable head of yours and am amazed how you size people up with those gorgeous big brown saucer size long lashed eyes.
    You make me smile!
    My leg and thigh muscles have gotten used to sitting & crawling around on the floor with you & my arms are stronger from lifting & holding you—I definitely burn more calories when we play together, so thanks for that!
    Love you~~ Mimi

May 7, 2012

The Good Ol’ Days

by Alison Friedman in Baby Land, Marvelous Madelyn, Mommy's Musings

Have you seen the movie “New Year’s Eve?” The one with basically every actor that ever happened who all play characters that are somehow and ridiculously connected and all end up solving their problems to try to make New Year’s Eve the best night, like, ever? It’s a very mediocre movie. Another incarnation of “Valentine’s Day” which had the same tricks up its sleeves (ride that pony, Garry Marshall!). And, really, neither of them come close to my all-time favorite that mastered this concept, “Love Actually.” They’re dumb and predictable movies, but totally satisfy a date night and a need to consume a bucket of popcorn. Okay, so back to “New Year’s Eve.” It’s not that good.

I cried. Big tears. Warm fuzzies.

We watched it at home this past weekend. We were comfy in our PJs, dirty dinner plates still on the coffee table, feet up, Madelyn long asleep in her crib, and there’s a scene with a couple (in what universe would Seth Meyers score Jessica Biel for a wife?) who just have a baby (I promise I’m not giving anything amazing away). So there’s Seth and Jessica, holding their brand new and very perfect looking baby all wrapped up in that famous hospital blanket — you know, the flannel one with the blue and magenta stripes on the ends — and that’s basically the whole scene.

Yes, I cried. I don’t think Bryan noticed. He was probably too busy trying to calculate Seth’s algorithm for locking in such a hot wife from another league and solving for X (Answer: X = out-of-touch casting directors). But there I sat in the corner on my side of the couch and I had to pretend I had to sneeze so that my watery eyes and flushed nose wouldn’t give me away. You know, FOR CRYING DURING “NEW YEAR’S EVE.”

This kind of bothered me. This wasn’t “Schindler’s List.” This was a seasonal rom-com that featured a not-as-cute-anymore, teenage Abigail Breslin and served as a platform to give Lea Michele an opportunity to sing in a film.

Then it dawned on me. The scene with Jessica Biel holding her hours-old baby (who’s actually probably three months in real life) made me really nostalgic for a time in our lives that was only a blink-of-an-eye ago, and so, so significant. Our time in the hospital with Madelyn was extremely sacred and special. Sure, maybe it was the gallons of drugs pumping through my body — and clearly, my brain — but those two days that turned into four while we were in the hospital were days that I — we — experienced the purest form of love and support from each other, strangers (like the hospital staff), and our families (like our parents).

It blows my mind that we went into the hospital as a clueless young couple in our late 20s and in one moment, suddenly there was a baby. No, I didn’t forget that there was a fourteen hour labor and the sudden change of plans to have a c-section and the prep and process to get me settled into the O.R. But just like anything — you take one step to go from inside to outside; you take one bite to go from famished to satisfied; you take one kiss to go from single to married — you go from one thing to something else. A physical metamorphosis, if you will. Sorry for the graphic-ness, but this is how we welcomed our daughter into the world, it took one slice to meet our baby. One moment she was inside me. Another moment, we were breathing the same sterile hospital air.

Moments after that, she was in my arms.

And many moments after that, she was wrapped in that same hospital blanket that the “New Year’s Eve” baby adorned as Jessica and Seth’s new kid on the block.

That blanket symbolizes newbornhood to me. The moment everything changed for us. I see friends become new parents on Facebook — because isn’t that how we all know what’s going on? — and people I haven’t even spoken to since high school; friends of friends from college — and that same blanket makes an appearance and my heart flutters as I long for that same wonder and awe that a new baby brings. I’m jealous that they’re experiencing that same newness and excitement that we enjoyed. I’m happy for them. Friends, strangers, whoever is reading this: embrace this hospital time. I know, I know, Madelyn is not about to get her driver license any day now. The girl just learned how to stand up. But, as gradual as babyhood into toddlerhood is and teenhood into adulthood as I remember, there’s nothing like the first few days of a baby’s life when it seems like life begins — again — for everyone.

I miss our days in the hospital. It’s crazy to even utter — or write — that I enjoyed our time with the beeps and the pulses and the wires and the pain and the interruptions. Bryan and I were treated with the same fragility as our newborn Madelyn. The nurses were patient, tender, and kind. Our families were full of emotion and pride. Our nooks on the Internet poured the love like we never could have imagined. And, the best, Bryan and I were both so new to the same thing and learned together what it felt like to be parents and mutually love our baby, crossing over together from one moment to the next.

Every day with Madelyn gets better and better. Yesterday I thought that I could love her no more than I did, and then today comes and my assumption is ruined and I’m proven wrong. And the nerve she has to get cuter and cuter — my eyes can’t handle such a feast! And that brain that grows as she learns and becomes smarter — I love watching her discover everything new. I can’t even fathom what tomorrow will be like. And don’t get me started on what may be in store next year at this time. My mind can only handle so much explosive love for this kid.

But I’ll always have a special place in my heart and fond memories of those four days in the hospital when the three of us were tucked inside a comfortable and snuggly cocoon with no distractions, and love that poured from every angle. It was kind of like the way we feel when it’s 12:01 a.m. on January 1st and we just had a kiss and Champagne and the rest of the year is ours to own. A new beginning.

Like one that the white flannel blanket with the blue and magenta stripes knows.

May 3, 2012

Last Call!

by Alison Friedman in Photo Eye Candy

Okay, everybody! Next round’s on me! (hiccup!) Let’s keep this party going! Whoooooo!!!

May 2, 2012

The Name Game

by Alison Friedman in All In The Family, Baby Land, Madelyn & Friends, Marvelous Madelyn, Mommy's Musings

Before we knew what we were having — other than a, you know, baby — I thought “oh my goodness! What if I have to have a c-section (I did) and I have a hard time recovering (I did) and I have to plan a bris for a boy? (I didn’t.).” At around 20 weeks, when we saw the ultrasound that showcased a hamburger and not a hot dog, I admit I let out a sigh of relief that I would not have to have a mohel on standby or put in a deli platter order at Brent’s seven days after I/Dr. Fiiiiine delivered a baby. Instead, Bryan and I knew right away that we would love to honor our baby girl with a naming ceremony.

Shortly after, we joined a reform temple in town and fell in love with the musical influences that reminded us of our Sunday school experiences and my summers away at camp. It was important to us that we raise our kids with a Jewish identity. We are not planning to force feed the Torah down our kids’ throats, but we thought giving them the foundation and allowing them to choose how they celebrate would be a good idea, especially since we took it upon ourselves as young ones to bring our Jewish heritage to our lives. Of course it’s only fitting that the only two pre-teens I know who actually ASK their parents to go to Hebrew school would marry each other. That’s us!

So instead of going to sleep at 6:30 p.m., Madelyn got gussied up and we did our best to keep her awake and seemingly pleasant way past her bed time for her March 30th baby naming ceremony. It was a wonderful and special evening. Our closest family and friends schlepped and gathered on a Friday night for Shabbat services with the rest of the congregation. Midway through the service, Rabbi Riter called us to the bimah and blessed us as parents and blessed our daughter as a newcomer to the Jewish people. We then said some words about Madelyn and her namesake and shared why we adore her so and how her name has so much meaning.

Up on the bimah with Rabbi Riter and Cantor Shukiar. When I was younger, I thought the bimah was for performing tap dances.

Madelyn's thinking, "In 12.5 years, that Torah is ALLL MIIIINE."

Madelyn’s Hebrew name is Shana Meira (Shay-nuh May-eer-uh) which means Beautiful Light. The Meira is the feminine translation of Meir, which is Hebrew for the name Robert. Robert was Bryan’s maternal grandfather and the only grandfather he knew. He had a wonderful relationship with him that revolved around jokes, food, and their beloved boys in blue, the Dodgers. Bryan remembers enjoying the company of his grandpa Bobby for as long as he could remember, and continues to miss him since he passed away in 2005, shortly after Bryan and I met. I only got to meet Grandpa Bobby just once when we visited Bryan’s grandparents in Las Vegas a few months after we started dating. I, too, remember him as a very kind and warm person. I’m looking for pictures to share of our visit with them, but unfortunately, I don’t think I took any, which is a rare and bad move on my part.

Shana is also Madelyn’s middle name, but we incorporated it into her Hebrew name as well. The “S” in Shana is for my dad’s father, Sidney, who passed away when I was a senior in high school. It’s difficult to admit, but I realized in the past few years that I was starting to forget him. The many photos of us help to freeze him in time, but his voice, his funny antics — I know they happened — but they can’t really find a place in my current mind. That makes me mad because, really, at 17, I was old enough when he left us that I should have these memories going strong and I don’t, but it’s also somewhat comforting to know that his memory lives in Madelyn’s name. I do, remember, though, that my Poppa Sid and my Granny, who is still alive and going struh-ooooong, used to call me their Shana Maidela (Shay-nuh May-duh-luh) when I was little, which means “beautiful girl.” So now, Shana also describes Madelyn, and, oh look, Maidela kind of sounds like Madelyn. We didn’t really do this on purpose, but when Bryan and I were solidifying our daughter’s name and then her Hebrew name, we saw this link and knew it was meant to be, b’shert.

I love that two men, Sid and Bobby, who never knew each other or the fact that their granddaughter and grandson got married to each other, are linked in their great-granddaughter’s name and the legacy she’s beginning for her own future and the generations that come from it.

But then also the meaning of Shana Meira is so delightful. She’s our beautiful light, literally. Blame the mommy goggles, but this girl blows me away with her beautiful long eyelashes, her rosebud lips, her silky skin, her deep and cavernous eyes, her silly putty cheeks, and her delicate fingers that tug at my heart all day long. And she is the light of our lives. Bryan and I feel more in love than ever and we know it’s because of Madelyn and the light she brings to our marriage and our home. And when I think of light, I think of brightness, and anyone who ever meets and falls in love with Madelyn always comments on her bright eyes that are so aware and thirsty to see everything around her.

After the naming ceremony, Shabbat services finished up and a lovely oneg with refreshments and mingling followed. Whenever there are big parties for special occasions, it always seems impossible to really chat with everyone at length (ahem!wedding!ahem!) and I wish I could have slowed down the minutes of the evening so I could have spent more time with some of Madelyn’s biggest fans! I realized now that Bryan and I didn’t even get a family photo of us with our mini guest of honor. Re-do please?

Madelyn's cake!!!! that.she.can't.eat.

Madelyn yawns through the oneg. It may be all about her, but we're ignoring her needs! Oops.

Madelyn always loves hanging out with her Auntie Phis! Tonight: Naming Ceremony. In 18 years: Pinning Ceremony!

Uncle Brian holds Madelyn, who is hanging on for dear awake.

You know you're an aunt when: you hold your wailing niece and you still enjoy it.

A quick smile for Grandma and Mimi and then it's lights out, people!

By the late hour of the oneg, Madelyn was turning into our little baby zombie. She was just oh-so tired, but did a great job during the service. Perhaps it was the constant milk, Mum Mums, and walks around the sanctuary that helped keep her content.

It was special evening that we’ll always remember. We are so glad that we worked with our amazing Rabbi Riter and Cantor Shukiar to learn about how to choose a Hebrew name for our daughter that would provide depth and meaning for her parents and grandparents, salute her ancestors, and build a foundation for her future descendants.

April 28, 2012

Sleeping Beauty

by Bryan Friedman in Baby Land, Daddy's Corner

Before Madelyn was born, you may remember that Alison and I were consumed with reading about all things baby. Well, after Madelyn was born, we didn’t stop reading — it turns out the questions only multiply after the baby shows up! I picked up the sequel to my favorite pre-baby dad book and have enjoyed following Madelyn’s growth month-by-month instead of tracking my insanity month-by-month (though I know it’s still there).

However, there’s one book I began reading before Madelyn that I continue to reference pretty frequently. It was a recommendation from multiple fellow parents called Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. I’ve really become something of a convert after reading it, and I seem to always find myself trying to enforce M’s sleep habits and push her “schedule.” Apparently, because of this, amongst Alison’s mommy-and-me friends, I’ve become known as the “Sleep Gestapo”, but I prefer “Nap Nazi” (because of the alliteration of course). This book about healthy sleep is the reason why though… well this book, and the fact that it was worked wonders for us so far.

A good sleeper from the beginning!

Honestly, Madelyn has always been a good sleeper, so we’ve definitely had an easier time than many other parents I know. But some of her great sleeping, I’d like to believe, has a lot to do with what I learned from reading this book. I won’t lie though — I haven’t exactly read it cover to cover. It’s not exactly riveting, at least not the same way my “being a dad” books are. But I’ve read enough of the important parts to gather the information we have needed as parents to make sure that Madelyn is getting all the beauty sleep she needs…and so are we. And it’s not just about us getting sleep too. For me, it’s about having time to ourselves and creating a good balance of time being parents and time being spouses.

There is one caveat to all my carrying on. I’ve come to realize that no matter what we read or hear from other parents, nothing can replace our instincts as Madelyn’s mom and dad. Alison and I know her pretty well at this point, definitely better than anybody else, so we are usually pretty good at figuring out what she needs. But we’re still pretty new parents, and things change so quickly, it’s nice to have some reference points and that’s what books and web sites and Alison’s “mommy boards” provide us.

So between Weissbluth’s pages, other parent experiences, and our own Madelyn-sense, we’ve been able to come up with a really great sleep plan that works for us. A little bit of this…a little bit of that. I know it wouldn’t work for everybody, but it’s been really great for us.

One thing I like about our sleep philosophy with Madelyn is that, even though I have a reputation as the enforcer of a sleep schedule, we really aren’t that tied to specific nap times. It’s really more about reading M’s tired signals (when she yawns or rubs her eyes) and being more conscious of the stretch of times she’s awake. It’s about consistency in the sleep routine (yay Sleep Sheep and Lovey!) and realizing the importance of sleep in her growth and development. Sometimes, I get home from work late and Madelyn’s already asleep. Sure I’d love to see her and play and have fun, but parenting sometimes requires a degree of unselfishness, and her sleep is important.

The other thing that’s great for Alison and me is that, sometimes, we just have to throw everything – nap schedule, bed time, consistent routine – completely out the window. Maybe she has to stay up for a baby naming, go with us to dinner at a restaurant, or wake up early and skip a nap for mommy-and-me. It’s okay! We know we can get her sleep schedule back in order after a day or two of being out of whack.

Asleep on Daddy's shoulder on the beach of Hawaii. She was soooo tired!

We just recently got back from a week long vacation in Hawaii where, needless to say, M’s schedule was pretty messed up. But looking back, she was actually kind of a rock star. I mean, she never really adjusted to the time change, but given her lack of naps of all her abnormal night wakings, she did pretty well. And now that we’re back, she’s adjusted pretty well. Heck, she’s asleep as I write this! Yes, yes, I know…she’s a good baby. We’re so lucky. I get it. But I think it’s also because Alison and I have sleep-trained her so well. It’s important to us.

Aaaaah, I love watching her sleep in her crib. Sometimes I look at her on the monitor and all I can think is, “I love her.” Is there anything better than the sight of a sleeping baby? I think not.

Comments (1):
  1. veronica lee
    4/30/2012 6:27 AM

    Awwwwww!! Absolute sweetness!!!

    Hi! Stopping by from MBC. Great blog!
    Have a nice day!

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