July 16, 2012
Coffee Junkie
Apparently Madelyn, like Mommy, needs an afternoon frothy caffeinated beverage to recharge and wake up. Stealing Mommy’s is not a win-win.
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Mama’s No Spring Chicken
If you don’t blog about your birthday, then you don’t age, right? Right? No? Crap.
Well, I aged. Over a month ago. Oops. I guess I’m getting so old and decrepit that I forgot to blog about my 29th that was in June, which is so uncharacteristic of me because as a young thing, I was a girl who enjoyed birthdays! It’s not that I dreaded my birthday this year, but I really actually forgot about it! It was my first birthday as a mom, and June 7th was no different: my day was all about Madelyn, just as it is every other day of the year. I like it like that. But sweet Bryan swooped me up and surprised me for a great birthday getaway to Catalina! Apparently, going to Catalina on your birthday gets you a free boat ride and lots of birthday greetings from everyone you meet if you wear a snazzy birthday pin. It’s like Disneyland at the beach.
We meant to enjoy Madelyn’s first boat ride but we were all uncharacteristically sea sick. No tangible evidence of that — thank goodness! — but we were pretty green as we chopped out to the island from San Pedro. And there was no A/C. And Madelyn’s very dirty poopy diaper was wafting in our space as she sat on our laps. Happy birthday, Alison. Here’s some hot shit for you.
Ugh.
We finally arrived and it was so nice to be on land. Not just because of the rough waters, but because it was absolutely gorgeous! The sky was a clearn, clear blue, the air was warm and breezy, and the water sparkled like a glass case at Tiffany & Co. I love the postcard scene everywhere you look in Avalon. The houses on the hills and the beachy vendors on the waterfront. Everything is just pretty.
Our hotel room was beautiful! We didn’t know what to expect since there’s no Marriott on the island, so Bryan booked a really nice boutique hotel that was excellent! We freshened up in the room after our boat ride and walked around the beachfront. We made friends with lots of birds and a deer that was just chillin’ on a hill a few feet away from the street. Meanwhile, we scouted places to eat and finally settled on a yummy steakhouse with great views of the water.
Our food was good and Madelyn was a champ at the table. I love going to nice restaurans and walking to our table while receiving the hairy eyeball from strangers who look us up and down and roll their eyes about their assumed now-ruined dinner. And then those very same people end up making friends with Madelyn who entertains them with general cuteness. Mm hmm. That’s right, biatches.
It was still pretty early and it WAS my birthday so we decided to extend our evening with a walk around the “downtown” streets when we stumbled along the world’s smallest bowling alley. Madelyn had fallen asleep in her stroller and we were watching the two lanes of bowlers enjoying little balls the size of cantaloupes and pins the size of shampoo bottles. One lane had two sets of older couples enjoying some good clean fun. The other lane comprised of a young husband and wife about our age who were all tatted up and the sole reason the adjoining bar was in business. They were absolutely plastered and when they saw us watching the games, we were their new sober victims.
Victims of what? Drunk, sweaty hugs and high fives (I was dying), over sharing about their sex life, and a dozen slideshows on their iPhones of their two daughters at home and inevitable parenting advice. They insisted we bowl with them and it was actually really entertaining and bizarre at the same time, especially because we knew we’d never see them again. But after we’d heard them repeat the same stories at least four times, each time more difficult to understand the syllables, we decided we were done when the game was over. But then the husband heard it was my birthday and bought us all a round of Coors Light. This would have been a sweet deal if I was a college fraternity brother. But I am an old lady who doesn’t do beer. Our new BFFs shoved bottles in our faces, shouted “happy birthday” at extremely loud decibels, and Bryan and I telepathically communicated that we needed an out. At that moment, not only did Madelyn wake up crying in her stroller, but the bowling game broke and the manager said the game would have to be restarted. There was our cue! And no one can argue about a crying baby needing to go to sleep! We thanked our new friends, snuck out with our bottles, and trashed them in a sidewalk garbage can, laughing all the way back to the hotel.
The next morning, we woke up and had to take the first boat back for scheduling purposes. We took a bunch of pictures of the scenery from the docks as we waited for our boat. Thankfully, the way back was smooth and comfortable. It was a quick trip but just what we needed to celebrate my first birthday as a family of three.
Later that weekend, we enjoyed grown up time with our friends at Malibu Wines. We brought a picnic and enjoyed a day in the Santa Monica mountains with the sun shining over us and great conversation filling the day.
My birthday ended up being a special one with all of our fun events and the people we shared them with. Next year is the big 3-0 and I’ll have an almost 2-year-old to chase around to keep me young.
Callin’ All My Girls
Since Tuesday, I’ve had the Bethenny Frankel’s theme song in my head because I heard it 8297349872 times in a 2-hour time frame. But I don’t care because I had such a fun time seeing her talk show which tapes on Ellen’s stage!
For my birthday, Bryan got me tickets to see her show and he thought maybe he’d go with me, but once he realized what a chick fest it was, he decided I should invite some of my gal pals and have a day off Mommy Duty. I gladly accepted the offer!
My best friend Stefanie and I are literally ob. sessed. with Bethenny. We think she’s so right on about everything: from motherhood to female issues to fashion. We are always talking about her and I’ve always said that Stef even kind of reminds me of Bethenny! They have a similar look and, more than anything, the exact sense of humor! So basically, we should be BFF with Bethenny. Think she’d hang with us?? Tuesday is the closest we got!
My mom is the one who introduced me to Bethenny. I never watched the Real Housewives of NY when she was on it, but I got hooked on her Bethenny Getting Married show because, hel-lo, she’s funny and it was a show about her wedding planning! Then I continued to follow her every move, so I owe my awareness of Bethenny to my mom!
Desiree and I have a zillion mutual friends so when we finally met and got to know each other, our mutual love for Bethenny rose to the surface pretty quickly. She’s also become a pretty awesome regular contributor on The Wedding Yentas, my business that’s all about Jewish weddings, and so I knew she’d get a kick out of attending the show. Not only did she attend, she fully participated!
In the parking garage waiting for the next event in the Bethenny Olympics.
When we arrived and went through the TSA-like security line 2 hours before the start of the show (those WB officers mean business!), we were corralled into the parking garage, but I, Alison Friedman, mother of Madelyn, do not wait. I act. So when I noticed a line of girls going out to a parking lot to be questioned about things, I figured it’d be more exciting than waiting in the covered parking area so out we went. Good thing, because the producers were asking us questions we might have for Bethenny. Stef and I completely blanked out which is rare for us since we never seem to shut up, but Desiree composed herself nicely, asked the producers her question, and was whisked away to a private producers’ room to be groomed to be on the show! Lucky girl!
My mom, Stef, and I returned to the covered parking garage with the rest of the dressed-to-the-nines audience for a little bit before being ushered to a holding area in the studio. Since Bethenny tapes on Ellen’s stage, we were told to wait in her conveniently placed gift shop which is right outside the stage. Lots of great tshirts and other goods for Ellen and her cause The Gentle Barn. I wanted to buy everything, but I didn’t because everything cost a zillion dollars. There wasn’t any Bethenny merchandise, but they did give her a place in Ellen’s gift shop in the form of… a cardboard Bethenny. Desiree joined us after her pow wow with the producers and we and the 250 other audience members harassed “Flat Bethenny” and took pictures with her.
Modeling for pics with Bethenny who managed to hold the same pose in EVERY PICTURE.
Finally, we were told to enter the stage and it looked even better in person than it does on her show! Des and I gushed over the Jonathan Adler design elements and we were obsessed with her bright and fun color scheme! We were basically ready to move in stat!
The warm up guy did his best to get people to do dance offs for…. Ellen tshirts? No surprise, we did not partake. Dear Audience Warm Up Guys, why all the dance offs? Can we not think of something more original? They’re not fun and predictable. The older Asian tourist always wins!
Soon enough, the show started! It was really fun to watch the process of how a show runs. I’ve been in audiences before, but I’m always fascinated to see how it all works. Bethenny is not exactly a natural talk show host — she’s still a little unpolished — but she’s very REAL, which I think makes her a good TV figure. You don’t feel like you’re watching a scripted talk show host; you feel like you’re listening to one of your girlfriends talk… but with cameras and lights on her. She’s doing fine. Her show has been picked up for national and long term airing, which will transfer to NYC, so it was cool to see the beginnings of her new career here in L.A.
Toward the end of the show, the producers switched Desiree’s seat, which was right next to me, to the other side of the audience so that her question would be in order of the segment which taped on the other side. So, we made a “new friend” who took Desiree’s seat next to me and who also asked a question. Des did such a good job with her question! She is a TV natural!
The girl next to me asked Bethenny about lap band surgery because her guests that day were Lauren and Caroline Manzo from RHONJ and Lauren had the lap band procedure. In the clip, you can see me googling a Bethenny on girl crush overdrive. Kind of embarrassing, but it’s true! I was mesmerized by her. And her wedding band. Which was 4 inches from my face. And my purse. Hmmm…
At the end of the show, Bethenny taped a few promos for the show and she let loose with the audience and her staff. She really is so funny.
Ever wonder how they do Before & Afters on TV talk shows? We now know. UGH boy do we know. After Bethenny was all done with her promos, she went backstage to “get ready.” What seemed like hours later, she came back fully dressed in new outfit with new hair and new makeup — almost like it was a different day. Because it “was.” She taped the “before” segment of a hair makeover for three women that would be taped for another episode of a show. So we saw the women with ugly hair get interviewed. Then, after our show, they taped another one and that new audience saw the “after” for these women. Interesting, yes, but we were there in the freezing studio for an extra hour and we were pretty tuckered out by then after all the sitting and standing and cheering.
Our “Bethenny” episode airs TODAY in L.A. at 2:00 on Fox and I am excited to watch it! We all had a fun time and my love for Bethenny has blossomed even more.
And this is why we live in L.A.!
Here’s the clip where Desiree is featured and where you can see me wanting to make out with Bethenny:
Sesame Cuddles
I’m beginning to experience something my parents and their generation never got to experience: watching new episodes of a TV show from their childhood with their children. Sesame Street is alive and well in this house, just like it was in mine when I was a wee one and I am SO EXCITED, but not in a Jessie Spano way and more like an Elle Woods way.
Everyone who’s met Madelyn knows that she’s a squirmy one. They know this because they’ve needed an inhaler from babysitting-induced asthma. Girlfriend does not sit still. She is so curious and grabby and move-y that she is not one to stop and smell the roses. She’ll plant ’em and water ’em and pick ’em, but stopping and smelling ’em? No. Not our Madelyn.
I’ve gotten fairly used to this, but it took a while since I, myself, am not a mover and a shaker. I can just sit and watch things for long periods of time. I’ve learned to up my stamina and keep up with Madelyn. But once in a while, I am exhausted and I just need a little cuddle time with my non-cuddler. I finally figured out what would do the trick: Sesame Street!
For the record, we are not leaving our kid in front of the TV and letting it raise her like Nana did with Peter, Michael, and Wendy Darling (seriously, what were those parents in Peter Pan thinking, letting a dog raise their kids?). No no, Mr. Sony is not a replacement for my mothering. But a handful of minutes of colorful and safe kids’ programming seems like a healthy and acceptable method of relaxing on the couch. I DVRed a few episodes so we’d have some relaxation inventory and I was so excited to cuddle with my baby and watch my buddy ol pals, Big Bird, Snuffy, Cookie Monster, Grover and Telly all come to life for Madelyn. And I was curious to see how Gordon and Susan and Maria looked after all these years.
My oh my, has Sesame Street changed since my day. Ohmygosh I just used “my day.” I am officially old.
The intro song — you know, “Sunny days, keeping the clouds away…” is basically gangsta rap now. After the first few seconds, I half expected a hologram Grover to show up and finish the song. There’s like a steady beat and some synth and it’s all very … not what I grew up with.
And there are so many new characters! Hardly any of the guys from my old crew were featured on the show we watched. Elmo made an appearance, but he was animated! Pssshhh. Cop out. And Oscar was on for a while, so that was refreshing. You know things are backwards when Oscar is refreshing. But Gordon? Daaaay-aaaamn. Gordon looked GOOD. That guy did not age at all. No other humans showed up and in one whole episode, Big Bird and Snuffy were totally absent. In their place, an orange monster named Murray and a magical fairy named Abby played big parts. Cute, but… not yo mama’s Sesame Street.
Madelyn didn’t know the difference, though, and was definitely fixated.
I was getting sad that my nostalgia wasn’t going to get satisfied in this new-to-me incarnation of Sesame Street. Madelyn was loving it, but I was looking forward to us sharing something from my past. A few weeks ago, I even bought her these plastic figurines that fit perfectly in her hands (and her mouth) and she loves to play with them. When I was at the store, I had a few different options, but I chose the two that I knew among the characters I didn’t know: Cookie Monster and Telly.
When they finally showed up on TV at the end of the show, I was so excited! Madelyn must’ve heard it in my voice and clapped for me! I got up and retrieved her Cookie Monster and Telly figurines and I wonder if she was confused about holding them in her hands and seeing them on TV at the same time. She watched intently and my heart flooded!
Today’s episode was brought to us by the letter Q and I know it sounds a little quirky, so please don’t be quick to judge, but spending quality time watching Sesame Street on a quaint morning under a quilt with my baby girl made me feel like quite the queen!
Eleven Months
Don’t even get me started on the insane and probably very irrational feelings I have about our baby turning one in just 4 weeks. Yesterday, July 9th, Madelyn turned 11 months and I can’t believe we are pushing the 12 month mark. This year has been the fastest and most eye opening year of. my. life. Okay, okay, hold it together, Friedman! We’re not there yet. We’re just on 11. Deep breaths.
Madelyn just gets more and more fun! Watching her learn and take in the world around her is fascinating to me. I think all parents say this and I just can’t believe I’m one of them. Her personality is sinking in more and more each day and I can literally see the synapses in her brain taking place every moment I’m with her. She’s even gotten too smart for hair bows and rips them off when she senses them on her head. How is she my child??
This month, Madelyn…
So many gadgets, so little time.
She’s just one crotch grab away from Al Bundy.
Can we watch Real Housebabies of Ventura County?
4 little Madelyn’s jumping on a chair…
And that’s 11 months as recapped by a fairly sane and composed mother. Next month’s recap? Yeah, don’t count on it.
She is so cute and happy I wish I could meet her! The blog is beautiful by the way!